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We didn't want to complicate your lives by giving you too many options to choose from.

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Now we had to relearn it again as something for fun to celebrate our relationship. You mean I am supposed to be excited about the fact that you are going to put your penis into the slaughtered mess that was now my vagina? I returned to the doctor for the ever dreaded pap smear. I understood what she meant and the painless pelvic exam decreased my anxiety. Like if I put in a tampon it would fall right back out. We finally made it happen one night on the couch (co-sleepers do it in the… For now the purpose of sex remains as a means to procreate and not just for the fun of it.

My mouth fell open and my stomach turned upside down. Most of the time these rough patches (the long periods of time when he wanted to have sex and I didn’t) were very rough. I never had an answer as to why I would go so long not wanting to have sex. Another layer of complication was that it took some time to change our thinking about sex. We had to relearn sex for the purposes of procreation. She said I would be OK physically and that I should consider doing it soon so that my mind didn’t start to make it worse than it really was. We are always trying to finish as fast as possible since Jack seems determined to be an only child. I don’t have much concern with the lighting, the position, the foreplay or the heat. I started my period about 7 months postpartum and by 10 months it was regular.

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But it wasn’t just the state of my vagina that made the 4-6 weeks recommendation laughable.

Before Jack I couldn’t relax enough to have sex if there was a dirty dish in the sink. I couldn’t figure out how shitting and showering fit into my life anymore much less an intimate moment alone with my husband.

So that completely took away the perk of not getting my period for 9 months. When I say I was terrified I am making an enormous understatement.

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Every woman experiences motherhood differently so naturally our return to sex after birth will differ.

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