Read Prudie’s Slate columns Mallory Ortberg: Good morning!
Some perennial advice: If you feel yourself about to say something terrible, stuff your mouth full of delicious, dry saltines until you can’t speak.
Is there anything I can say to my friend that might make her rethink this?
A: There are a number of things you might say—that numerous Americans speak more than one language, that punishing a little girl for speaking the language she grew up with is capricious and cruel, that in trying to erase this child’s past she’s only causing unnecessary pain—but I’m afraid your friend might be in no state to hear them if she thinks of a native language as something to be punished out of a child. You’re already reasonably aware of your own limitations as a concerned friend.
It has gotten to the point where they now punish her if they catch her speaking Russian.
When I asked my friend about this, she said that "she is an American now." I know it's not my right to butt into their parenting, but this breaks my heart. And her ability to speak both languages, I think, would be an asset and a gift.
A: “Hey, kiddo, don’t kiss me on the lips, kiss me here [point to cheek].” Your 8-year-old stepson isn’t trying to be creepy—he’s 8, and he’s just doing what he normally does with at least one of his other parents.
It’s also fine, if you feel up to it, to acknowledge that they have likely been concerned for you, and that you’re doing your best to continue to seek treatment for your health and well-being. You are already “repairing” things by committing to taking care of yourself. Kissing stepmom: I've known my stepkids (12-year-old girl, 8-year-old boy) for four years and have lived with them for one.
For one thing, I work for myself, and when I catch a cold, I either suffer lost wages or miserable work days; I make sure never to share glasses or bites of food with the kids.
For another, it frankly just creeps me out to see a child's face homing in on mine for a kiss while making full eye contact; I've taken to swerving and giving him a kiss on the cheek and a hug, or kissing my hand and putting it on his face in a silly way, but I can't do this forever.
Trotzdem ist dem ein oder anderen vielleicht ab und zu nach ein wenig Zärtlichkeit, Zuneigung oder einfach ein bisschen Aufmerksamkeit zumute.
Und natürlich bietet Tinder sich auch hervorragend an, um gezielt nach potentiellen One-Night-Stands suchen.